Snippet Sunday: FRESH BEGINNINGS 07/06/2015 #travel #Route66



~~~
FRESH BEGINNINGS
We continue with Fresh Beginnings, Jared's story as he travels through five states
 in the US in a Motorhome. I used our itinerary from our US travels two years ago
 and wrote a romance story around in.
Jared has just arrived in the US.
Enjoy!
~~~



"Sir, may I see your passport?"


The lady behind the counter would've been probably in her thirties. Although overweight, she had a beautiful face and Jared thought he even saw a hint of a smile. She'd asked him a massive amount of questions, leaving him feeling like he was back at school, and he didn't want to fail and be sent back to Australia.
"Bringing in any medication?"


"No, ma'am."
"Any food."
"No, ma'am" He hesitated. "Ah, ma'am. I've got a few leftover bikkies in my bag?"
The customs officer looked up at him with raised eyebrows. "Bikkies?"
Jared got nervous. "I suppose you'd call them cookies." He grabbed the package out of his backpack and showed her the item in question.
She laughed, and it was a genuine and beautiful laugh. Shaking her head, she replied, "Only you Australians could come up with a word like bikkies." After a moment's pause, she said, "They're all yours, honey." And she proceeded with taking his photo and fingerprints.
That hadn't been all that bad.


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20 comments:

  1. I like this moment, Iris. Everyone should have such a friendly time at customs! :)

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    1. We were so worried, but everyone was kind and helpful! Thanks Sarah.

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  2. This was cute. Love this snippet.

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  3. Loved the exchange, and learning what Bikkies are. :)

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  4. I love the description. And the bikkies.

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  5. Sounds like my first experience going to the UK from the Netherlands. Glad Jared is having such a pleasant welcome. So many don't.

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    1. We travel a lot and I'm glad to say, 9/10 dealings with customs has been very positive :-)
      Glad you had a positive experience as well, Eden.

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  6. Fun exchange between the characters. Differences in terminology can create a lot of opportunities for writers!

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    1. Indeed ... and make life a bit tricky for the foreigner who has no idea about the nuances ;-) Thanks Jeff.

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  7. That was a fun little exchange and I could relate to his case of nerves. Loved the snippet!

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    1. Thanks Veronica. Glad you liked it!

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  8. Bikkies... Now there's a word I haven't heard of before. I love the easy banter and conversation, it was cute. Great snippet!

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    1. Thank you. I'm glad you liked it :-)

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  9. Great exchange. Loved the custom officer's reaction to the cookies.
    One personal beef (had a discussion with a group readers a while back that made me sensitive to this line) ~ "Although overweight, she had a beautiful face..." I would have preferred something like "A bit over weight, she had a beautiful face" The other way might imply that overweight means ugly and not everyone feels that way. Just my opinion.

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    1. Agree, it's been a written clumsily ... because someone is overweight doesn't mean they can't have a beautiful face. Quite the opposite!
      Good point, Chelle. Thank you!

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  10. That sounded funny. I never saw any custom officer laugh before, as if gloom is in the job description.

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    1. Thanks Linda .... shame that custom officer have such a bad reputation. This one was really nice :-)

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